Aurie and the fear

Aurie leaned against her apple tree in the sun and thought about what Noah had told her at their last meeting: connecting with the power of love is the prerequisite for trust.

She had recently tried to consciously sense whether people were connected to love within themselves. She could perceive a clear difference: people who are connected to love radiate more calm, more friendliness, are more open to others, are somehow kinder - with themselves and with others. They carry more lightness and joy within themselves. Aurie found people who are separated from love inside to be very heavy, dark, unhappy, restless, less open and friendly and she could sense less joy in them. They are also harder on themselves and with others.

She thought about how her grandmother had recently looked at her for a long time in the kitchen and she could feel the love with which she looked at her. "What is it?" she had asked at some point with a smile and continued kneading her cake dough. "It's amazing, Aurie, how much love you have inside you," her grandmother had answered gently. Aurie had looked at her in surprise and briefly stopped kneading her cake dough. "Why are you so surprised?" she had asked. "Because it's not a given," her grandmother had said and looked out of the window somewhat sadly. Aurie could feel shadows passing over her grandmother's heart. She had taken her hands out of her cake dough, gone to her grandmother and put her arms around her. Her grandmother had stroked her cheek, kissed her and smiled gratefully. Then she had stood up and energetically finished kneading the dough.

Aurie frowned as she remembered how clearly she could feel the shadow passing over her grandmother's heart. It was as if someone had covered her grandmother's love at that moment and she could not shine as brightly. She had felt her grandmother's heart grow heavy, whatever she was thinking about at that moment. Aurie had not dared to ask. But she sensed that her grandmother was probably afraid. Aurie just wished she could magically remove that shadow from her grandmother's heart.

"Only your grandmother can do that," she heard Noah say and saw him appear next to her. He sat down on the grass opposite her, as he often did.

Aurie smiled happily as she watched his smile. Whenever Noah appeared, this deep calm always spread through her. And she was curious. Because every time he appeared, she learned something new about herself.

“What do you mean?” Aurie asked him after a while.

"You were right about your feeling that your grandmother was afraid, Aurie," Noah confirmed. "And now remember the situation in the kitchen: Was there something your grandmother had to be afraid of at that moment?" he asked.

Aurie shook her head. "No! After all, we were just baking cakes. What would she be afraid of?" Aurie asked in surprise.

"Exactly. That means there was nothing external that caused your grandmother to feel fear at that moment. So where did the fear that you perceived come from, Aurie?"

“From her thoughts?” Aurie guessed.

"Correct. Your grandmother's thoughts caused fear in her. This kind of thought creates the same emotions, sometimes even worse, as if it had actually happened. But in that moment nothing happened. However, her thoughts alone caused suffering in her," Noah explained.

Aurie felt sorry for her grandmother. Why was she torturing herself? Why was she making life so difficult for herself? She sighed.

"Let's look at what fear does to you, Aurie: Whenever you are afraid, you cannot think realistically. You are not aware of what is happening right now. Your mind, your ego, creates a different world. It paints a picture of a future that is usually worse than what actually is. Your thinking is controlled by fear and is no longer free. The greatest challenge never comes from outside, it is always within yourself. Remember what I taught you about your ego. You can tell from the heaviness in your heart that you are resisting what is happening right now. Fear is also a form of this.

When fear arises in you, ask yourself: How does it arise? Why am I afraid? And in most cases it will turn out that the fear is caused by your thoughts. Not by the situation itself. When you are afraid, however, you are unable to act, you are completely separated from wisdom and also from your inner guidance. And then people do incomprehensible things."[1] Noah continued.

Aurie knew this. She had once accidentally broken the neighbor's porcelain cat on the stairs by bumping into it. She had been very afraid of her reaction and had run away. She had heard her scolding her from behind the hedge. For two weeks she had not dared to go near the neighbor for fear of being scolded or worse. She had lain in bed at night and seen herself in front of the screaming neighbor. The more she thought about it, the worse the scenario became in her head. At some point she had not been able to stand it any longer and had told her grandmother about her mishap. Her grandmother had taken her by the hand, picked a bouquet of flowers with her and then went with her to the neighbor. Aurie had been glued to her grandmother's feet and had not been able to look the neighbor in the eye when she held out the bouquet. And her grandmother had had to support her a lot so that she could tell the neighbor what had happened. The neighbor had simply sat down on the steps, looked at her and asked why she hadn't told her right away. Aurie had worried for two weeks for nothing.

Noah grinned at her. Of course he had noticed what Aurie had just been thinking.

"Exactly, Aurie. Your fear was completely unfounded. If you take responsibility for what you do, fear has little chance."

“What do you mean?” Aurie asked.

"Let's take your example with the neighbor. If you had gone to her right away, she might have scolded you a bit or you would have had to help her clean up. How would you have felt in the two weeks that followed?"

Aurie thought for a moment. "I would probably have been quite relieved and apologized. I didn't do it on purpose. But above all, I would have slept much better in those two weeks and wouldn't have avoided my neighbor. There was no reason to."

“You see. Your thoughts would not have been able to tell you a story that causes fear.

If you ask yourself why you are anxious, you can more easily find out what to do in the situation or what support you need. Because you are not lost in the fear, but are consciously looking at the situation.

Remember: an emotion is the physical reaction to your thoughts.[2] If you deliberately question your thoughts, the artificial fear can no longer exist," explained Noah.

“How do I know if I’m doing something out of fear?” Aurie wanted to know.

"A very good question!" Noah grinned. "When you do something out of fear, you are usually rushed, nervous, tense, restless, you don't feel well, you are afraid, your breathing gets faster, you worry, your thoughts go in circles, you find it difficult to think clearly.

Above all, you notice it when you cannot accept what is happening and you resist it. Fear does not want change; it comes from the ego. Fear is the absence of trust. Fear and trust cannot exist side by side."

"But isn't it good to be afraid sometimes?" asked Aurie. "When something is dangerous, for example?"

"This type of fear is a natural reaction, it helps you survive. The dog growls at you, you run away. But as soon as the dog is gone, there is no longer any reason for this fear. Only your thoughts of 'What if I meet the dog again?' maintain the fear and you continue to live in it, even though the dog is not there. This artificial fear is useless and destroys your life energy."

That made sense to Aurie. She had experienced herself how fear had drained all her energy.

"If you notice that fear is coming up in you, ask yourself: where does the fear come from? What exactly am I afraid of? Concentrate on your breathing, connect it from the top of your head to the soles of your feet, as I have already shown you. Concentrate on your inner energy field and draw your egg of light around you. This creates space for you and you can protect yourself from fear. When you have calmed down a bit, ask yourself: what can I do now? What do I need? You will be able to think more clearly and find an answer," Noah instructed her.

"Be aware, Aurie. You are responsible for your thoughts. You are responsible for your state of consciousness. Make that your most important task."[3]

“But I still ask myself: How do I know that I know what to do and that I am not afraid?”

"You can observe the situation and don't have to act immediately. You can wait and consider. You have more peace within yourself, your breathing is calmer, you can think clearly. You don't fight against what is happening right now, but concentrate on what needs to be done next. You can make clear decisions. You have confidence in your own strengths and know that you will find a solution. And you trust in your inner guidance." Noah winked at her. "If you have trust, inner guidance is possible. I'll tell you more about that another time," Noah explained.

"Remember, Aurie, fear is a very strong force. Fear does not always come from within yourself. Often you absorb it unconsciously from those around you and adopt their thoughts. Especially when fear is very widespread, it is difficult to distance yourself from it because it is very powerful. Fear stops you from changing anything. Fear is part of the ego and it cannot survive if you are conscious of your thoughts and actions. So it will always try to stop you.

Therefore: direct your attention completely to what is happening in this moment. Be completely present where you are now and with what you are doing. Make your state of mind your most important task. You are not at the mercy of fear. Look at the situation consciously. What can you do in this moment? What do you need? And you will see the possibilities." Noah was silent.

"Thank you, Noah. Now I know what to do when I'm scared," Aurie said. "Nobody has ever explained that to me. I thought it was completely normal to be scared. Because I can see fear in many people."

"Fear as a natural reaction when it saves your life is normal. Having fear that is fed by your own thoughts is madness. The fear that you see in many people can only continue because they do not deal with where it comes from. And when they are separated from love, they no longer perceive themselves well enough and do not feel what they need. This gives fear, the ego, a lot of space." Noah stood up.

"So practice well, Aurie, to find out where the fear comes from. The more fear you perceive on the outside, the more important it is to be vigilant with your state of consciousness, with your thoughts, and to connect with the love within you. Ask your guardian angel to strengthen you and to put his wings protectively around you whenever you feel even the slightest hint of fear within you. Then it will be easier for you." Noah smiled at her and disappeared.

At that moment, Aurie felt deeply protected, an endless love flowed through her and she knew that Noah had wrapped his wings around her. Aurie leaned happily against her apple tree. She would never forget this feeling. "Next time I'm afraid, I'll use this to help me and ask Noah to protect me."

[1] Tolle, E. (2022). Being the light. Challenges as a pathway to conscious Evolution. Eckhart Teachings. Sounds true - Waking up the world.

[2] Tolle, E. (2001). Practising the power of now. A guide to spiritual enlightenment. London: Yellow Kite Books.

[3] Tolle, E. (2022). Being the light. Challenges as a pathway to conscious Evolution. Eckhart Teachings. Sounds true - Waking up the world.

© Sara Hiebl